Shaggy Police Dog Story

Here is a good one to start you off, Now this could well be an urban myth, but I have a mate who swears it happened to a mate of his, so let's take him at his word shall we...

It concerns the mate of a mate (Let's call him "Jim" to make it simple) Jim was a patrol constable on a beat which contained a rather large and not particularly pleasant council estate. On the day in question he gets a call to an address on the estate to deal with a minor incident.

As he arrives and knocks at the front door he is joined by a rather large and scruffy looking Alsatian dog, the dog joins Jim on the door step and waits to be let in.

The owner of the house opens the door and Jim and the dog enter. It soon becomes apparent that the owner is a rather timid man and appears to have little experience in talking to the police, he looks nervously at Jim as Jim makes notes of his complaint. He also appears to glance at the dog several times in a quite strange and enquiring way. Jim thinks the fellow is a little odd but, then so are a lot of his 'customers'.

The dog by this time has sat in the living room paying equal attention to Jim and the house owner, he soon gets bored of this and starts to chew at the furniture. He has a good gnaw on the dining room chairs then a bit of a chomp on the table. It then crouches down on it's back legs and curls out a massive steaming turd in the middle of the fireside rug!

Jim is totally bewildered that the dog is allowed to do this, the owner looks embarrassed and rather sheepish but does nothing to chastise the dog, which takes a sniff at it's masterpiece then goes to curl up under the table.

Anyway, Jim has finished taking the details, and so taking care not to stand in the poop he bids the owner farewell, as he is walking down the garden path the owner shouts to him

"What about your dog officer?"

I think Jims hearing let him down at this stage!

© Bob Slot 2006